Ships in The Night
by AoiSouls
Summary: Kevin has held his silence on his feeling, the heart of the one he loves resides in silence as well and like ships in the night they pass each other by. Kevin and Edd will have to survive the expanse and fear of social exclusion to find that one person worth having in the deteriorating word around them. (suck at these)


**Warning: **This fic contains fictional drug use, violence and psychologically damaged children but really who isn't in high school There will also be sexual encounters in the next chapter. if any of these things offend your delicate constitutions please leave.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing except the plot and a few OCs such as Dean and Gossip Nurse. If you do try to sue me please understand that I am too poor to even feed myself most weeks so it will literally be like trying to get blood from a rock. I honestly have nothing of value.

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><p>Chapter 1- Silent Waters<p>

He doesn't know when it happened, it was like getting a cold. He woke up one day and it was there the disease of these unwanted emotions clawing their way into his heart. Double D had suddenly encompassed his whole world. Nazz had grown boring, unable to hold his attention. She was a nice girl and their relationship had ended on good terms, Kevin was thankful for that he would have hated to lose Nazz as a friend that is why they both held off on ending their relationship for so long. It was a relief to the both of them. Nazz knew of course, she had it all figured out before Kevin did.

Sophomore year went by fast and still Double D had no clue out Kevin's feelings for him. Kevin was just waiting for the right moment to tell him. Then the start of junior year started and just as Kevin had come to grips with his emotions, Double D got himself a boyfriend. Some stone kid from the town over. Dean or Dan some bullshit name like that. Kevin hated him. Time went on and Kevin and Double D never spoke. Kevin still got into the occasional fist fights with Eddy but the other Ed's tended to stay out of their fights now. The children had grown into men during the school year Eddy finally getting that growth spurt making him taller than Edd but still shorter then Kevin and Ed. Ed grew until and grand total of 6'3'' and joined that basketball team.

Kevin was still on the football team as quarter back he was hoping a sports scholarship would cover his cost of college there was no way he could make it without one. The costs ever rising with the economy going downhill fast. Kevin also started working at the candy store his dads company sold jaw breakers too. The old man that owned the place was a good guy and made sure Kevin had time off for football games and practices. The day Kevin first felt the tangible silence between himself and Double Dee was he came into the candy store with his boyfriend.

"We had so many jaw breakers as children I'm honestly surprised Ed And Eddy's teeth didn't fall out heaven knows those two don't have the best oral hygiene." Double D said to his boyfriend as they walked around the store.

"I bet you'd taste sweet after sucking on one of those." Dean said none to quietly arm wrapped around Double D's shoulders.

"Shhh …Dean! That is not appropriate conversation for a public setting." Double D said, face beet red and shoulders hunched.

"Who's gonna care Dee, the Neanderthal at the register?" Dean said, looking back at Kevin noticing his stare. Just to antagonize the clerk Dean pulled Double D into his lean frame and kissed him roughly. "You already taste sweet no need for the candy." He said after the kiss licking his lips obscenely. The rest of the time in the store when without incident as Dean gathered up his candy haul.

"Hey Kevin." Dean said scrutinizing Kevin's name tag. Kevin was checking out deans items while Double D tried avoiding making eye contact with Kevin after the display He and dean had made in his work place.

"You total is $24.25." Kevin said, trying not to breathe in the stench of pot smoke coming off of Double D's boyfriend.

"God, why is fucking candy so expensive?" Dean grumbled while handing $30 to Kevin. Double D made a little huffing noise of exasperation his eyebrows pinching together in a way Kevin had always seemed to think was ridiculously cute.

"You would crave so much if you didn't smoke Marijuana." Double D chastised. "It's not good for your health." Dean shoved him a bit making a scoffing noise while taking his change and grabbing his bags of candy.

"We've had this discussion Dee, I'll smoke what I want. The world so fucking ugly without it. Such dumb shit faced people, you're the only one who gets it. Don't you get sick of being the smartest fucking person in the room all the time?" Dean said, tossing plastic bag of goods over his shoulder letting it hang. Double D was quiet and left the store without even saying goodbye to Kevin. Too busy with His boyfriend to even notice that he had grown up with the cashier.

It was ten minutes later when Kevin unclenched his fists. Double D was with that piece of shit, that waste of space. Kevin was pissed sure he had bullied Double D and the other Ed's up until half way through middle school but Double D didn't even see him anymore. He somehow managed to stop fucking existing. Kevin wondered if this is how Double D felt when his friends started dating.

They spent the rest of the school year passing each other silently in the hall. Senior year rolled around, before Kevin could blink and not even two weeks in Double D looked like hell. Finally on a particularly hot day in the middle of the year Double D crashed into him. Kevin looked down at the smaller male and noticed the dark rings around his eyes and bruises on his arms, and the emotions Kevin had been holding onto rocked through him like cannon balls. Kevin was so angry if Double D had been his he wouldn't have bruises, he wouldn't flinch, and smell like pot.

They would have been so happy. The waves of rage over took and he slammed Double D into the lockers. Those were his choices rage or tears and he wouldn't cry not over this boy who walked away with his heart.

"WATCH IT, DORK!" Kevin yelled out at the boy not sliding down to the floor. This wasn't what he wanted, he wanted to ask him if he was okay. He wanted to hold him, and nurture that silent hope Double D seemed to hold onto through childhood. So he left Kevin walked away and went on with his day floating back out into the perpetual ocean shrouded in night. Away from the light house that was Double D. The football team crowed around him in the hall and together they moved through the packed halls as an armada. The year nearly continued back into the usual silence and would have had the school nurse wasn't such a gossip.

"Anway Missa, You know that boy I told you about the one who worked as my assistant, he is such a bright boy he said he was going to test out of high school I wonder why he didn't?" Said the nurse into her cell while wrapping up Kevin's arm. He had gotten a rather nasty cut during football practice. "Well I think it has something to do with the boy he was hanging out with…. no, no… the Goth looking one not the short one, I don't think they are friends anymore I never see them with him." She finished with Kevin's arm and showed him to the door still talking on her phone.

Now that Kevin had thought about it he never did see Double D with Shrimpy or Ed. Then a thought struck him if they weren't his friends anymore, was Double D all alone? Kevin found himself waiting by Double D's locker he would be there soon. He always stayed until the end of football practice at the library. Right on time as usual Double D was headed towards his locker face still in a book, not even seeing Kevin or the spill in the hall that he slipped on. Kevin went to help Double D up, grabbing his fallen book while he was at it. They had seen that it was one of those self-help books on overcoming addiction. Oh god… was Double D addicted to something, that son of a bitch Dean must have gotten him hooked.

"You on somethin' Dweeb?" Kevin asked not meaning to add the slur at the end but did by habit. Double D's eyes shot to the book quickly and then to Kevin. He had gotten skinny, Kevin didn't think it was possible. Double D had built up some muscle from the stint he did in the swim team but he seemed be wasting into nothing. "Shit man, are you okay?" Kevin asked, trying to recall what Double Ds voice is sounded like.

"Salutations Kevin, I am currently not experiencing any distress." Double D said not making eye contact. Kevin Fucking hated it that was the one thing he had liked about Double D when they were kids, he always looked you in the eye and always told the truth, when asked outright.

"You're lying, what's wrong dude?" Kevin asked this time a bit more gently still holding on to Double D's shoulder so he couldn't just run off. The kid could move surprisingly fast, probably from all the years of running from him. That thought hurt more than Kevin cared to admit.

"I…Dean is in need of assistance so I am attempting to help him." Double D confessed the stress of the words rattling his bones. Kevin has never heard Double D sound so exhausted.

"You could do better then that loser, why bother?" Kevin said, wanting to pull Double D closer but the chance of being seen by a student to daunting to allow him to give in to the urge. Double D would probably allow it to, he looked so worn out.

"He is NOT a loser, He is just… he had so many expectation of the world and if fell flat, everything so dull and the people ignorant, He just…he is lonely." Edd all but yelled his voice cracking with the attempt to hold back the tears. The shaking of contained sobs rocking his body like turbulent water. Too tired, too done with everything, to correct Kevin's grammatical error in speech.

"You're smart egg head, if he cared about you, shouldn't you be enough?" Kevin said calmly, quietly adding "It would be enough for me." Kevin was shocked that he let the words slip and Double D stood rigid and stock still.

"You… Kevin.."Double D tried never finishing before Kevin cut in.

"SHUT UP, SOCKHEAD!" He yelled no longer looking at Double D but at the ground. "If you tell anyone I'll fucking kill you." Panic swallowing his heart, His breathing as erratic as his thoughts.

"Kevin…" Double D was interrupted again this time by the other football players leaving to go home. Kevin's panic grew in great proportion and in that moment grabbed Double D and threw him into the janitors closet just a few feet behind them, keeping his mouth covered and his body pinned against his backing away from the door he slammed shut. He didn't breathe until he heard them pass. After they were gone Kevin released Double D.

In the awkward silence an ugly thought reared its head. Kevin could kiss him, Kevin could kiss Double D and no one could really stop him. Just the thought of it made him shudder he wasn't one of those sick fuck that like to hurt people. He just wanted to kiss him so bad. He needed to get out of there and fast before he did something he would regret.

"I wasn't here got it sock head, you breathe a word of this to anyone and I'll tell the whole fucking world about what's under your hat." Kevin knew it was low he planned to take that to his grave but the situation called for drastic measures in his mind. With that he stormed out of the closet leaving Double D behind the silence between them even more deafening.

It wasn't until graduation that they even made eye contact again. The day that really changed everything for them both.

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><p>Thank you for reading this festering puke of a fanfic. if you enjoyed then please review and I will post the second chapter of happiness and love. I also do apologize for the lack of updates for the Countdown the will be updated soon.<p> 


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